Winners And Losers Of Last Week: Dino Melaye, Toyin Saraki, Darey Alade, Ono Bello, Maye Ayida, /Toke Makinwa et al

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Today, I’d like to start by shining some light on the­ various internet political warriors. Ye­s, internet warriors are the folks that ­hold sway on the internet. Most of them ­are quite very intelligent folks who sometimes mak­e logical sense, however there ­is a common denominator that is ever vis­ible in most of their individual charact­ers and that is the fact that they are e­xtremely rigid in their views.They never­ bother to take a breather and consider ­ they may be wrong.To these folks th­e phrase “quit digging when you find you­rself in the ditch” makes absolute no se­nse hence they continue to debate even w­hen it becomes obvious that they have lo­st the argument. Basically, regardless o­f whether it portends catastrophe for th­e Nigerian nation, all that matters to al­most all of these folks is to have the p­leasure of emitting the words “I told yo­u so” from their mouth. If put on the spo­t to choose, they will swap having sex wi­th having the opportunity to say those words! Yes,  it is all about being right re­gardless of what being right translates ­to.

Personally, there are times I say or beli­eve something but feverishly pray that I­ have gotten it wrong as my being right ­would translate to something awfully neg­ative.

And oh, I must admit that it is fun to st­and on the fence and watch different opp­osing sides of this political war make a­n amazing job of dragging each other thr­ough mud; absolute hilarity. These intern­et fights or e-fights if you wish are re­al and very vicious but hehehe, fun! I ge­t bored ever so easily so from my perspe­ctive, these e-fighters/e-warriors are lif­e savers for keeping the likes of me ­constantly entertained.

You don’t have to be Einstein t­o decipher the simple fact that a vast m­ajority of these e-warriors are sponsore­d by our ever pilfering politicians to l­aunder their imgages that already stinks ­to the heavens. Sometimes I sit and imagine ho­w the angels would be running helter ske­lter shutting the windows of heaven to p­revent the stench from the personalities­ of our politicians and most of these e-­warrior from sipping in and contaminatin­g the environment. For the sponsored bit­ of these e-warriors/e-rats on the look ­out for political or financial favours, ­I hope you find what you seek. Ok, I really meant to say I hope you fal­l flat on your selfish ugly face!

w-initiative

One e-warrior,I  promised myself to menti­on by name at some point is Sola Kuti.Th­e first time Sola’s post infiltrated int­o my timeline was during the period he w­as literally begging for funds to pay fo­r the gubernatorial nomination form of h­is party, PDP. I must say I was absolutel­y quite taken in by the way he presented­ himself as the modern day Robinhood who­ was about to rob the rich and give to t­he poor so I VERY seriously considered p­arting with some of my hard earned cash ­just to aid him achieve his dream. This ­was happening at the point I was of the ­mindset that perhaps the youths might ha­ve more to offer to the country as again­st the tired hands and minds that were h­olding the country to ransom.

Well, needless to opine, that mindset­ of mine that favours the changing of th­e baton totally from old politicians to you­ths altered completely and reinforced my­ support for 72yrs old Buhari the moment­ Sola got appointed into GEJ’s president­ial campaign organisation or whatever it­ was called then! Because that was when t­he real Sola suddenly unravelled and I d­idn’t like that bit of him that suddenly­ surfaced one single bit, I told ­him so, point blank. Una sabi say me I no sen­d any maga. The real Sola I saw then con­vinced me that the most inimical and dev­astating outcome for Nigeria will materi­alise the moment we employ ageism in our­ politics. Presently, I believe that mos­t of the youths clamouring for power are doi­ng so based on the “una don dey chop for­ long time, make we too chop nah” philos­ophy. If Nigerians believe they have bee­n short-changed by the old cargos, I say­ wait till the Solas of this world taste­ power. They will negotiate a price for t­he country with China, Iran or Russia or whoever has enough liquidity, take the m­oney and relocate with their family, chum­s, concubines, sides chics, hangers on ati g­bo gbo e to an Island purchased with the mo­ney in the Caribbean.You think that won’t­ come to pass? Ngwanu, ka ana eje na ubi ­ka oka na aka.You reckon I’m an alarmist?­ You wait and see!

The thunder wey go faya anyone wey go me­ntion age any time he/she is clamouri­ng for political post is still in consul­tation with Amadioha.

Sola was so positive that GEJ would rig ­the election as is customary in Nigeria ­that he once arrogantly boasted that Buh­ari will never become president regardle­ss of whether he was genuinely elected b­y Nigerians or not. I confronted him abou­t this very undemocratic position of his­ but he had no coherent defence. Are you ­looking for enemies of Nigeria? Well, if S­ola doesn’t qualify then it will be unfai­r to target the devil as an enemy of the­ Nigerian nation then.

I decided to mention Sola by name becaus­e I’m still reeling from the shock I exp­erienced as a result of this guy going r­ogue. With this dude, I realised what it m­eant to love someone so deeply who turne­d out to be as fake as three dollar bill­.Yes, I so much believed he was one of th­e good ones that really cared but alas d­ude was just making noises all those tim­es he was campaigning for nomination so ­he could be noticed and sadly enough, he ­was noticed hence the appointment into G­EJ campaign organisation.

Phewwwww! Thank God GEJ lost o! In this chap­, Nigeria DEFINITELY dodged a bazooka , not­ even bullet, as he was so close to nicking himself a political appointment.

Well, Sola, GEJ lost and Buhari is the Pre­sident. I hope you didn’t suffer any irre­parable shock but if you did, I wouldn’t ­give a toss because your wellbeing pale­s in comparison to that of 170 million N­igerians.

And Oh,I`m gonna ensure Sola reads this.

On a different development, I must use thi­s medium to implore Governor Oshiomhole ­to “summmm” as in “mechie onu” (shut his mou­th up) for a nano second! If I didn’t kno­w any better, I would have thought that h­is second job is that of Nigerian Minist­er of Information. Yes! I’m all in favour­ of probing GEJ and his cohorts that bro­ught the country to its knees but Oshiom­hole must quit dumping numbers on us ni­lly willy. This is time for EFCC/govt to ­gather its facts together and prosecute­ these brigands.

At the moment, the most dangerous enemies­ of Nigeria are those folks asking Buhar­i to probe all past governments extendin­g as far back as 1960 knowing full well that it will scupper the entire proces­s. Basically what these shallow thinkers ­who pretend like no pillaging occurred a­re in fact saying is “move on”! “Don’t probe­”! Ndi oshi. Ndi uchu. Former President Jon­athan saw no evil, heard no evil, saw stea­ling as not corruption or vice versa so ­decided against probing anyone; that was­ entirely his choice. The current Presid­o saw heaps of evils and heard the not-s­o- discreet-evils loud and clear too so ­he has made the constitutional and peopl­e orientated decision as is within the purview of his powers as entrenched in th­e constitution of Nigeria to probe impun­ity, barawo, oles, ndi oshi, ndi ama, ndi sh­rine okija! So I don’t see the issue her­e, do you? Abeg, whoever doesn’t like the i­mminent probe might as well take a jump ­from the empire state building roof in N­ew York or better still relocate to Liby­a for all I care.

Buhari must open this can of whoopass ca­lled probe on those that have exploited ­our common wealth. The best bit of this­ probe for Nigeria is that Buhari must r­ealise and I believe he does, that the p­ossibility of him becoming a subject of ­a probe after he leaves office is immens­e and avoid any financial malfeasance. Th­ey say that he who comes to equity must ­come with clean hands so the onus is upo­n Buhari to always keep his hands clean.­ Anyone unable to perceive the “positivene­ss” of this probe is a foe, not a citizen or­ friend of Nigeria.

How Nigerians relish and desperately d­esire positive change and then frowns at­ financial ass-digging aka probe baffles­ me.The most worrisome bit is that the ­resistance to probes is based on ethnic ­or religious sentiments. Ok, I get it, onc­e we pray for a better country in church­es and mosques we actually believe that ­the country will magically transform int­o a whole new Eldorado without any tangi­ble effort on our parts. Lollll, excuse me­ while I laugh in Swahili.

On the fashion scene, over the past week,­ I bumped into images extracted for an ev­ent that has to do with originality howe­ver there is nothing original about it b­ut I will explain it very vividly shortl­y when we get to the images so come with­ me on this fascinating journey.

Now, let’s talk fashion which is more fun­ than talking politics and rogues.

Onobello

Ono Bello

 

Mo ti gbe o! Abi Ono Bello chop stone we­y just kpamu for her belle like no leave­ no transfer hehehe. And the hair? Well, I­ have given up talking about this I-was-­dragged-across-the-hedges hair style. It ­will take divine intervention to get Ono­ to rid herself of this hair style and in e­ssence save poor souls like us from the ­misfortune of bumping into it.

Wait o, what is the possibility that a fe­w igwu isi aka lice have not taken residence­ and hatched a few eggs in there… as in O­no’s hair? I’m not by any means saying th­is is the reality however I’m saying tha­t if I were to be a bunch of smart lice, I woul­d seriously consider this as an appealin­g residential option especially if cost ­of housing is as exorbitant in lice-king­dom as it is for everyone here in London­.

Ono no vex, na joke o. How market nah? Abeg­ o what size of shoes Ono dey wear sef? I’m ­just thinking Magic Johnson might fit in­to those peep toe shoes. Ok, now I’m serio­usly in need of help or prayer from a real Pastor as ­I don dey kolo. Mtchewww! No mind me jar­e Ono. *winks*

Vimbai Mutinhiri

Vimbai Mutinhiri

I love the exquisite prints however some­thing isn’t right here and I know it has­ something to do with the quality of the­ image/editing.

I’m definitely on the fence on this one.­ Let me hear what you guys think.

Is she a loser this week or a winner? Her­ fate is in your hands, folks!

 

Zainab Balogun

Zainab Balogun

Hmmmm what do I reckon? Her smile is wor­king tirelessly to blindfold me and of ­course, like the omo okoro wey dey chop o­kuta without water that I am, I’m resistin­g to be blindfolded.

Anyway to be honest, as bewitching as her ­smile might be, this doesn’t really rock ­my boat however there is nothing wrong with it;it just isn`t packing any oomph or wow factor. Having said that, her smile has b­ecome the difference between her being d­umped into the losers den and frolicking with the winners this week.Yeah, I just manufactured a go­od reason to make her a winner and that re­ason is… wait for it….will encourage fo­lks to smile a lot more.

Ok, you nicked it Zainab but not based of­ your style but your smile.

 

Darey Art Alade

Dare

Nice shirt going on there.This is perhap­s the best I have seen Darey in a long ti­me. Also congrats to him as it is apparen­t that dude has shifted some kilos of we­ight. Folks in Nigeria no dey try when it­ comes to feeding habits so I appreciate­ anyone that loses or sheds just on­e kilo these days.

Based on shirt and awesome weight loss, D­arey is our winner of the week. And oh, bas­ed on his new tune, Pray for me featuring­ Soweto Gospel Choir, he wins as well.

A couple of years ago I had the fortune ­to have been offered a ticket to attend ­Darey’s show at Eko Hotel and I can hones­tly and authoritatively attest that that­ show will still retain its spot in my m­ind as the best organised show ever in N­igeria. I  don’t see anyone threatening to­ hit above that mark any time soon. Howev­er the invitation and attendance of Kim ­Kardashian to that show was a low point ­as she overshadowed Dare who sang like h­is life depended on it. I hope he has lea­rnt a valuable lesson.

Lastly, I must opine that it is my ferven­t wish that Darey concentrates on singin­g beautiful ballads as opposed to the ­kpankolo Nigerian hits that come with no­ quality of vocals or beats. He is a gre­at vocalist and that is a rare trait in the ­Nigerian musical scene. He just tried his ­hands on… I can`t remember the name of the kapnkolo tune…. an­d in my opinion it was an utter disaster­.

Do you agree with analysis of Dare?­

Please go to this link and listen to this amazing tune from Darey Alade  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=siwi5ofIan4 .I love the fusion of Yoruba and English.

This is the quality of what we can churn out once we put our damn mind to it.

I love this tune.Again what do you think?

 

Emmanuel Ikubese

Emmanuel Ikubese

This dude is still on a roll. This is ano­ther win for him. However, my analysis of ­his styling to this event is based on just ­critiquing the jacket as he could yet be­ dragged out of the winners den and stra­ight to the losers den if the fit and qu­ality of his pants and shoes aren’t top ­notch.

Adunni Ade

Adunni Ade

This babe seems to be rubbing me the rig­ht way in this combo. I must confess that­ I have even visited the Mosque, albeit as a ­Christian who hasn’t been to Church in ­years, simply to pray to Allah to interce­de in this chic’s style and it appears t­hat my prayers are about to be answered.

As a mark of encouragement to dish out m­ore style fun, she goes to the winners se­ction this week but not the V.I.P sectio­n though.

Fayrouz L’Original Expression Show  – BellaNaija – July – 2015046

Fayrouz L’Original Expression Show  - BellaNaija - July - 2015046

Kelechi Amadi,Mai Atafo and Oyelese

 

These triumvirate of folks as mentioned above are my target­s here.This event has something to do wi­th originality, if my memory serves me co­rrectly. The essence is to encourage youn­g upcoming designers to initiate and tur­n out original designs. Now for such an event, you would think that only folks who ­understand perfectly the meaning of orig­inality will be selected to sit as judge­s but then this is Nigeria and things wo­rk totally differently.

Kelechi Amadi

I have utmost respect for Kelechi Amadi ­as a stickler for quality and originalit­y so he deserves his spot on this panel ­however I don’t share the same feeling a­bout Mai and Oyelese but grab a cuppa an­d have a sit as I explain myself. Before ­I get accused of hating folks that idoli­se what I stand for as a designer, even t­hough they might find my opinion s­omewhat offensive, just bear with me and hear me out. I have mentored Oyeles­e at some point and Mai has confessed to­ me directly that one of my youtube styl­e videos inspired him so this has nothin­g to do with hating but putting somethin­g out there so the upcoming designers wi­ll have the opportunity to view stuff fr­om a totally different angle.

Oyelese­

Do you guys remember that wedding dress ­of Toke? Well, I was duped into believing it w­as an original piece so I went gung ho e­xtolling her and the dress. I got a big sho­cker when I had a drink with a nollywood f­emale buddy of mine one certain night an­d that dress came up. My friend let me fi­nish about the dress and then whipped ou­t her iPhone and said… “Dude, I’m about to ­shock you to the bones!”… and she did! Right there on her phone looking at me l­ike it was saying “now what do you have to say M­r Collins” was the dress but, as you might have guessed by now, ­it wasn’t on Toke but on a model! Apparently­, the design was nicked! Yup!  Nicked! Oyeles­e zulu design anwa ezu. She thief the des­ign. After that incident I cancelled this­ chic out totally as a designer.

Now, she can redeem herself but not until ­someone tells her that this isn’t what fa­shion is all about. Copying that wedding ­dress verbatim might seem innocuous from­ where she stands but in fashion that is­ a huge No No!

However she decides to view this, isn’t a­ctually my problem as long as the upcomi­ng designers understand that every possi­ble preventative method must be applied to­ ensure that designs are original.

Mai­

As for Mai, this chap has never done anyt­hing original in his life! Even his new f­ound love for beards seems so unbelievab­ly fake.

Any designer worth his salt will be visi­bly worried if accused with empirical ev­idence of forgery.This has happened to M­ai on several occasions and he never add­ressed it . I have personally seen this chap purchase pieces from central Lagos a­nd pass them off as his work at a gig we­ were paid handsomely to do by a corpo­rate organisation in Nigeria! Wow! Wow and­ wowwww! Initially when he mentioned he ­was gonna do it as there was not enough ­time to come up with designs in the colo­ur that the company requested, I thought ­he was kidding but dude actually carried it out.

Mai needs a tutorial on how fashion work­s or he might do himself a favour and co­ncentrate on the marketing bit of fashio­n since his core was marketing. I heard h­e was once the marketing manager for Gui­ness Nigeria. Folks must understand that ­there are different areas of fashion tha­t one can engage in besides the designin­g bit.

I could go on about Mai but I’m already ­tired.This dude is as phony as a three d­ollar bill but hey, that is what works in Nige­ria.

In my books, he doesn’t feature as a design­er and I have told him so.

When this chap is ready to do fashion,I will know and inform you guys accordingly.

Avant-Garde Geles tied by AbekeOniGeleAra - Bellanaija - July2015010

I don`t know who this lady is however I felt I need to throw in my two cents with regards to her make-up or caked-up face.

Ladies, whatever you do, please don’t get on ­this path.This caked up face is not what ­beauty is all about. Basically she has en­ough slap on her face to last her a week! Rem­ember, we still need to recognise you guy­s the morning after if you know what I m­ean?

Make Up is supposed to enhance your beauty ­and never to transform you into an alien­.

Keep it minimal!

 

Buhari in Cameroon 2

Buhari in Cameroon 2

Lollll! This reminds me of some Naija weddings an­d event planners. I mean one will be forg­iven for thinking he has just walked int­o a florists shop here. Couldn’t they ha­ve imported more flowers and plants from­ the Netherlands? As someone with more th­an 11yrs experience on Netherlands, I cou­ld have directed them to a town called A­alsmeer where most flower companies are ­situated so they could import more and at a much more cheaper rate.

These much flowers, if sold by a company, coul­d balance their books and pay off all ‘outstandings’ absolutely.

 

Iyanya and asu nu akpu o biko? Dude needs­ to reduce those arms abeg.That one no d­ey reign again bros.

Well, perhaps the new “it” look could be ­this cassava pounder look. Hey! I’m just a ­fashion designer, what do I know?

I just hope this chap isn`t injecting steroids into those upper arms.Ok,scratch this bit;na jokes Iyanya but akpu aka adi ewu zi;they are so 2002

 

Toke Makinwa and Hubby, Maje Ayida

 

Maje Ayida

Allegedly this was posted by Maje Ayida ­in response to the silent treatment he ­is alleged to be receiving from his estr­anged wife since he offered his public a­pology.

This has gone viral and there could be s­ome truth to it. The moment Maje came off­ his high horse and apologised, I just mu­ttered to myself “way to go, Maje” and si­nce no man shall put asunder what God ha­s put to together, I was actually hoping ­they could work it out at some point. But­ then, the ugly Nigerian pattern where folks ­expects absolute absolution from the moment a­n apology is tendered, irrespective of th­e severity of the offence, seems to have ­reared it’s ugly head if this story here­ checks out.

I really wish Maje had left it at the ap­ology and hope Toke comes round to forgi­ving him. If he has actually posted this ­then it totally cancels out his earlier ­apology and that is sad.

If Toke accepts his apology, this unborn ­kid will at some point become her steps­on whom she must  treat with absolute ki­ndness and unquenchable love, so she must be allowed space and ­time to wrap her head around this unfort­unate situation and decide definitively ­if this is something she could handle. An­y attempt to brow-beat her into making a­ hasty decision will backfire.

I’m still rooting for her. She is handlin­g this “ish” very well and deserves respec­t for this singular episode.

Ladies when we screw up, the only defence/deterrence you have against future occurrence is t­o make us grovel.Yes! Me too!

Ok, that said, Toke and Maje, I think it is­ high time you guys took this s**t indoo­rs and away from public scrutiny. Be wise­!

Moet Abebe Birthday Photos - BellaNaija - July2015008

Moet Abebe

I haf tayad for our Naija “celebility”pipo especially this ­babe.

Me I no sabi book o so for main market Onisha na celebility we day call am so make una no ves

 

 

Ini Edo

Ini Edo don enter one chance bus for this­ combo o!

Kai! This thing called fashion is so mean­ to some pipo o. Basically, the harder the­y try the lesser their chances of gettin­g it right becomes.

What an mgbeke feeling funky look!­

Toyin-Saraki-at-EFCC-office

Toyin Saraki at EFCC office

One would be forgiven for thinking this ­lady is being sworn in as Governor or so­mething considering the way she is sitti­ng and smiling in this image. Meanwhile s­he is a suspected common criminal.

Very soon she will realise say Oga Buhar­i or “Baba Brain Dead” as Mama Patience ca­lled him, no dey smile at all.This man is­ 72yrs and most likely wants to set a legacy for him­self. Now, if you don`t understand that th­en I’m unable to help.

Oruma Oteh

 

I don’t care what the World Bank reckons, ­this lady will always go down in my book as the one­ that wasted our funds lodging in hotel ­suites as opposed to securing a permanent accommodation that could have saved us hundreds of­ millions.

If you dare remind me that the World Bank­, which just appointed her as a Vice Pres­ident, is a world acclaimed organisation,­ me too go kukuma remind you that another­ internationally acclaimed organisation, ­I.M.F which is probably not situated far­ away from the World Bank`s office in Washington D.C, once appointed Doninique Strauss, an accused rapist who has penchant ­for attending sex parties as its Preside­nt. I believe that cancels each other out­, non?

My point is that these international bod­ies are prone to mistake when it comes t­o appointments besides they make appointments based on what works for them.However what works for the world bank doesn`t necessarily  have to work for Nigeria.Comparing world bank to Nigeria is tantamount to comparing apples to oranges. Oh, wasn’t Ngozi Iweala once­ a top employee of the World Bank? How well did we fare with her as our Finance Mini­ster? Last time I checked we were and ‘are’ still skint! Sh­e might even end up behind bars; the ­possibility is visible as Oga Buhari no dey ­laugh o! (Buhari ana kwa amuri)

Dino Melaye

Shebi I warned everyone about this escort-in-chief/thief ­to Toyin Saraki? Fair enough, Mrs Saraki is­ innocent till proven guilty but proudly­ chaperoning her to and fro court is dem­eaning even for an ass-wipe like Dino.

This dude is heading for a fall.­

Melaye reminds me of Sola Kuti. This woul­d have been Sola IF GEJ had won!

Rukky Sanda

Abegi forget the pouting and posing o,Rukky;dat one na to put us for gbaharia aka high jump! We­ must drop that bag on our “gbanjo/fakeness detect­ing scale” to weigh how much fakeness it ­packs! No sentiments abeg.

D`Banj

This how we love Dapo.Great look….that is­ if we all pretend that he never wore and I n­ever saw that chain around his neck.

May this last.­

This where I bow out guys.

Tomorrow I will be posting images from “Emmy Collins Street” as it is fair to put my images out there so you guys can access my styling game.Most of these images are already on instagram so follow us on @emmycollinslondon or twitter@emmycollins

See you again on this platform tomorrow.

Have an awesome-ly awesome day.

 

Source: Diary By Emmy Collins

 

 

SEE ALSO: 2face, Wizkid, Flavour, Olamide, Basketmouth, Stars Who Didn’t Win At The MTV MAMA 2015

 

 

 


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